


Three Months

by cannotdeal_withyou



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: F/M, Heartbreak, Loss of Feelings, end of long relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2020-05-14 08:12:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19269244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cannotdeal_withyou/pseuds/cannotdeal_withyou





	1. The Fight

The air was heavy in the living room. They sat across from each other, on opposite sides of the couch. Everything had changed in the past hour, from Calum’s desperate confession to the tears running down Madeleine’s cheeks. 

“Mad- I-” He reached out to wipe the tears away and she recoiled from his touch.

“Don’t.” The ice in her voice wrapped around them, a reminder that nothing would be the same. “How long, Calum?” It was a question, but stated so flatly that he wasn’t sure he could answer. “How long have you not loved me anymore?”

“Three months.” A plain answer seemed the best route to take.

“So our anniversary, when you got down on one knee and asked me to marry you, you knew then? You knew when I booked a venue? You knew when I tried on wedding dresses, when I called my mom, when we sent out invitations to an engagement party? You knew the whole fucking time?” She wiped at her tears, sadness retreating as anger appeared. “You let me think everything was fine.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you, I swear.” He swallowed, trying to find the Madeleine he knew in her stormy grey eyes. 

“Well, look how that turned out.” She laughed, a bitter laugh, sharp as a knife. Her usually put together exterior was cracking, showing him a raw side of her that was rarely seen. She looked down at the simple ring still adorning her ring finger and swallowed hard. “I’m going to go pack.”

“Mad. You don’t have to move out yet.” He watched her stand up and twist the ring off her finger.

“Frankly, Calum, I don’t want to see your face ever again.”

“Madeleine. It’s 2 AM. Just wait until morning. I’ll sleep in the guest room.” 

She stalked towards their bedroom, messy brown hair flying behind her, and her shoulders set back. “I’m leaving now. You can have this back. I’ll send movers for the stuff I can’t fit in my suitcases.” She tossed the ring over her shoulder towards him and he watched it hit the floor.

Madeleine was a woman of purpose. She ripped open drawers, just to gently place her clothes into the suitcase, leaving them nicely folded. It was almost terrifying how calm her packing was. Calum watched from the doorway of their room as she worked to empty every trace of her from the room they shared.

She glanced briefly at the picture of the two of them in front of Madison Square Garden on her nightstand and with a gentle flick of her wrist she knocked it face down. “Don’t want to see anymore lies. You can keep that picture too.”

He sighed, a long deep sigh filled with regret. “Loved you then.”

“Frankly, Calum, I don’t believe you. I don’t know if you ever really loved me. You do understand that you kept something so important from me supposedly for only three months. Our entire five year relationship, tainted with the confession you couldn’t bear to include me in. I feel fucking stupid, Calum. I feel used and betrayed and really fucking angry. But I mostly just feel hurt. The type of hurt that is so deep that I can physically feel it. My heart is aching.” She zipped the last suitcase, grabbing her key ring with shaking hands, desperately trying to get his key off her ring.

He held out his hand wordlessly and she dropped the key in his hand. “I will let one of the boys know when I’ll send someone over to get my furniture. Duke, where is Duke?” She looked around and opened the door to the patio, whistling for him. He came running and she picked him up, kissing the top of his head. “Mommy loves you, okay? Be a good boy for Daddy.” She set him down and picked up her suitcases. Calum met her eyes and took a step towards her. 

His hands reached out with a mind of their own, desperately wanting to hold her one last time before she walked out of his life forever. Tan skin met creamy, pale skin and she flinched before involuntarily relaxing into his embrace. She tilted her head up at him. 

“One last kiss for the road?” She didn’t wait for him to respond before she pressed her lips against his, a desperate kiss, the taste of her tears in his mouth, and her shaking body in his arms. She pulled away, heading for the front door and he fought the urge to call out to her. She turned to look at him and he felt it then, the hurt washing over him as her lips formed the words he didn’t want to hear. “Goodbye, Calum.” 

He watched her tail lights travel down the drive and unscrewed the cap on a bottle of whiskey. 

In the end, it turned out that her mother had been right. Calum would ruin everything.


	2. The Cliff

Calum stood in the kitchen of his new house, looking out the large picture window at the ocean. 

On the marble countertop sat an unopened envelope addressed to him. He knew this moment would come eventually, the day the embossed envelope would appear in his hands and Madeleine would be officially gone from his life. 

He hated the sight of the return address, two names instead of just hers. He hated that when he opened it the flowery language would request his presence at a ceremony he didn’t want to witness. 

There was no question about who ended their relationship. The fault lay squarely on his shoulders, where he still carried it, even now, two years later. 

She had warned him that she was sending the invitation in a simple text, one of the only moments of contact they had in the two years they’d been apart. 

Madeleine had struggled with the concept of inviting Calum to her wedding. Something about having Sierra as her maid of honor and inviting the rest of the band and their significant others but excluding Calum didn’t feel right to her. 

It had been a difficult talk with her fiancé, Jasper, convincing him that Calum would not try to stop their wedding, he didn’t love her anymore and hadn’t for some time. Painful memories were brought to the surface, memories of the night she left and never looked back. 

In the end, after much reassuring and explanation, he agreed to extend the invitation with a plus one. Wedding planning with Jasper had been much like that from day one, Madeleine wanting something and having to justify what she wanted to him. 

And so the invitation went out, traveling from the couple’s house in Calabasas to Calum’s new house in Malibu. 

Ironically, the invitation was in the first delivery of mail to the house, so when he sorted through his mail for the first time, there it was. He dropped it back on the counter as if it was made of ice and left it there most of the day, figuring that if it wasn’t opened, then it wasn’t a real invitation. It wasn’t until the sun began to set that he grabbed the invitation, a glass of whiskey, and a cigarette and stepped on to his patio to open it. 

He drained the glass and opened it, leaving it in the envelope and took a long drag off his cigarette. Duke nosed around by his ankles and he smiled, putting out the cigarette and picking the small dog up. 

“Mommy’s getting married,” He sighed, “I don’t know if I should go.”

Duke, being a dog, didn’t say a word, just cuddled into Calum’s chest. 

“Yeah, you’re right. I should be mature about this.” He slid the invitation out and turned it over 

Madeleine Sarah McKinley  
&  
Jasper Dean Turner 

Request your presence 

on

July 3rd, 2021

to celebrate their union in matrimony 

Ceremony begins at 4pm

Reception to follow. 

 

His chest tightened and he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. 

There it was, in delicate gold ink. At one point they’d looked at wedding invitations just like this, samples that had their names on it. Seeing her name above someone else’s name was not something he was prepared to see. 

It took only 7 days after Madeleine left for Calum to realize that he did indeed still love her. Foolishly, he thought he would give her a few weeks to cool down before he tried to talk to her.

Weeks turned into months and then Luke told him that she had been on a couple dates with someone new and seemed like she was moving on. So, Calum let her go, but he never stopped loving her from afar. It was like he was poised on the edge of a cliff, waiting for her to come back.

Now, he knew. She was gone and nothing would bring her back. He had to step back from the edge and find a new cliff. He wasn’t prepared for the sharp edge of pain after so long hoping for her to come back. 

Duke brought him back down to Earth by licking his cheek and he realized he was crying. 

The invitation bore the proof, a small wet spot where a tear had fallen on the returnable insert.


	3. The Fitting

As fate can be a cruel mistress, the first time Calum and Madeleine locked eyes again was not at her wedding. 

Somehow, circling in the same friend group, they’d managed to avoid each other entirely for two years.

The timing couldn’t have been worse, he was rushing to a meeting, walking down a street he’d walked many times before, when he happened to turn his head to the left and there she was, in the window of a bridal shop. 

Sierra noticed him first, freezing in place, the panic evident in her white knuckles gripped the stem of her champagne flute. 

Time slowed down as Madeleine turned to examine her dress from the side, chatter dying down when she met Calum’s eyes from behind the glass.

Seeing her in a wedding dress broke something inside of him that he didn’t know was still whole. 

The champagne glass in her hand slipped through her fingers, shattering on impact with the wood floor, and time returned to normal. 

Before he knew it the bell above the door chimed gently and she was standing on the sidewalk in front of him, gathering the full skirt of her dress to keep it from dragging.

Sierra ran out after her, struggling to lift the train of the dress, shouting apologies to the employees who stood shell-shocked inside the shop.

“Calum?”

“Mad.” The once familiar nickname felt wrong on his tongue, so he tried again. “Madeleine. You look beautiful.”

“Oh,” She swallowed hard. “Thank you. What- What are you doing here?”

Calum turned and gestured to the building next to the shop. “I have a meeting with my agent at 1:30.”

“You better get going, then.” Sierra piped up, her brown eyes pleading with him. 

“Ma’am, we really need the dress back inside the shop.” 

Just like that, she was gone again, back in the shop and disappearing into the dressing room.

“You need to go to your meeting, Calum.” Sierra shook her head, a laugh escaping her lips. “You always have had the worst timing.”

“Tell Luke I’ll call him tonight?”

“Of course. As if you’d ever miss your nightly catch ups.” Sierra hugged him briefly and turned back to the store. 

The scene in the dressing room was nothing like Sierra had imagined, Madeleine wasn’t crying at all.

Instead she was emotionless, examining every detail of the beaded bodice in the mirror.

“Do you think this side is symmetrical or should we send it back to the beader?”

“I don’t see anything unsymmetrical about any of the beads.”

“Hmm. I’m just not sure about the beads.”

“Are you sure it’s the beads you’re not sure of?”

“What?” She was still examining the dress, avoiding eye contact with Sierra.

“Madeleine.” Sierra’s voice was firm, yet gentle.

“I’m fine. Please just drop it.” 

“Okay. I have to run and grab Luke from the airport.” Sierra paused for a moment. “The dress is perfect and you look gorgeous. I love you.”

“I love you too, honey.” They embraced and Sierra left. 

The store attendants helped Madeleine out of her wedding dress and back into her regular clothing after a few more measurements, assuring her that it would be perfect for her wedding day in just under two months. 

She didn’t expect Calum to be waiting by her car. 

“Can I help you?” She unlocked her Alfa Romeo and gestured for him to move aside.

“I love you.” The words escaped his lips desperately. “And I know you love me.”

“But not in the same way.” She paused for a moment. “You need to RSVP. I have to confirm with the caterers and the planners my final count by next Friday.”

“Okay.” Pain gnawed at her heart and she finally pushed past him and opened her car door.

“Come or don’t come, Calum. But don’t come to me two years later and tell me that you love me when I’m getting married in two months.” She scoffed. “Seriously, Calum.”

“I’m sorry. For all of it.” He held her gaze.

“Sorry doesn’t really mean anything to me anymore. Good to see you again, Calum.”

She closed her door and started the car, driving off. She got around a few corners and pulled into a parking lot and let the tears come. 

The dam was broken and the river of tears flowed until she had no more left to cry.

Seeing Calum had rocked her afternoon, but she wouldn’t allow him to rock and disrupt the life she’d created without him.

Drying the tears from her cheeks and eyes, she reapplied her foundation and concealer, dabbing blush on her cheeks and carefully coating her lashes with mascara.

A swipe of nude lipstick brought her back down to earth. 

Her phone rang and she pressed answer. “Hey Jas. Yeah, the fitting went really well. I’ll be home in like a half hour. Love you.”


End file.
